Unapologize
by Emma Vance
Summary: The sequel thing to Apologize. This time it's Fai's POV! Rated for themes and a yaoi pairing. PLEASE READ Apologize BEFORE you read this! Thanks!


** Hi guys! Em here! This is the second part to the first fic **_**Apologize**_**. This time I made it from Fai's POV, with of course another song!**

**I don't have too much to say right now, but I hope that you guys like it!**

**Warning: Sexual themes, although the rating is there just to be safe. If you didn't read **_**Apologize**_** go check my profile and read that first! Also the pairing is yaoi, so if you don't like it then get out. Just get out. . .**

**Disclaimer: *bored monotone voice* All these characters belong to CLAMP, and the song **_**Unapologize**_** (see what I did there XD) belongs to Carrie Underwood.**

**Read, Review, and Fangirl on!**

_Last night I told a little white lie, I was pouring out my heart like a waterfall to you._

It started in Piffle. I just couldn't keep my mouth shut.

_And with one kiss I was a runaway train. Flyin' off the track to you._

It was a party and I had drunk myself into a stupor. In reality though, I just wanted an excuse to get close to you. To pass the boundaries I had confined my actions and feelings to.

I got too ahead of myself. First I flirted. Then I kissed you, I figured that you were drunk because your warm, intoxicating lips kissed back. Your muscular arms pulling me close made my mind fuzzy.

Then I went too far.

_I love you came flooding out, couldn't make it stop, couldn't shut my mouth._

"Mm. . . I love you." I gasp, pulling slightly away from you. Your body goes rigid and I come out of my haze- realizing what I said. My eyes widen in shock but I make sure to keep a smile on my face. Acting normally and slightly drunk I pull farther back.

_I felt like a fool, then lied and said I was-_

"Oops. I'm sorry Kuro-rin~!"

You wrench away from me and march toward the door.

Your almost there when I hear myself speak again, "I'm sorry Kuro-tan. . ." I trail off and expect you to keep going- just as you always do.

Instead you turns around.

"It's too late to apologize, mage."

I protest against my better judgment, "Bu- but Kuro-chuu-"

"I said it's TOO late." You snap, and slam the door behind you. I stare at the door after you, then place my fingertips to my lips. I must have imagined you kissing me back. I must have made it up to appease my own mind.

"It's TOO late." Floods through every corner into my brain as a couple of tears fall from my face and onto my lap. I hadn't wanted to apologize, but I needed to- to go back to things. I can't get close.

_But I-_

"Unapologize. I unapologize, Kuro-sama." I whisper staring longingly at the door.

I decided that since I knew I couldn't have you in real life then I'd settle for the fantasy you of my own creation.

_You know, people say a lot of things that they don't really mean._

I got to play normal in ReCourt. I added more lies to my web. I received more disproving glares from you, but that didn't matter. It's just a game and I was determined to have the winning hand.

But then you went and decided to be fucking stupid.

I wanted to die. If I was to die that way, from my injuries, there was to be no way around it and Fai might've forgiven me. BUT NO! You HAD to give me vampire blood. YOU HAD TO GIVE ME YOUR BLOOD. YOU HAD TO BECOME MY GAME! I never thought that you in all your stupid ninja glory could be so blatantly suicidal!

So I decided that when I woke up you'd be Kurogane.

But of course I didn't want to distance myself more, but I didn't have a choice.

_Couldn't help myself when you held me tight,_

I was as cruel as I could be to you in Infinity. Making no contact, calling you Kurogane, purposefully making the feedings brutal. I wanted for you to suffer as much as I had.

Then in Seresu you crossed a different line.

I was still 'Fai' to you, my past still of no concern. As far as you cared I was a rogue mage, the 'stupid, idiot mage' that I had been the entire journey. You opened my eyes farther and you destroyed the object of my nightmares because I was too weak to do it myself.

And then in exchange for my forsaken life you went and chopped off your arm.

One of your strong, muscular arms that I love so dearly. And you did it to save me.

It was an act that I thought I would never forgive.

But when we landed in Nihon, I saw your cold, almost dead body lying on the ground. The warmth that I had come to associate with you was gone, and I couldn't stand the thought of losing you. Not at all. You had to live, you had to live. I had to tell you what I really thought.

I vaguely remember asking myself if this is what you felt when you saved my life in Acid Tokyo.

Except this time it was my fault that you were in this situation.

I walked into the room after Tomoyo-hime had given me permission, and I acted upon my anger.

I punched you in the head with as much strength as I dare muster.

"That was payback, Kuro-sama." I gave you a real smile.

You grinned back, "You're going to get punched out you creep."

I stood there for a minute as Tomoyo-hime excused herself, then sat gingerly down on the edge of your futon. There is something comfortable about the room. It made sense because much had been forgiven.

I pick up your remaining hand and turn it so the palm faces up- tracing the lines with the tip of one of my fingers.

You breath catches but I'm not sure why. I look up in concern that I'd hurt you but you're just staring at me.

"Mage-" You start but I stop you.

"Wait," I say, "I need to tell you something first," before you break my heart in some way- my mind whispers. I take a deep breath and stared into those burning, crimson orbs that I love so much.

"I meant every word. I won't take back the way I feel about you. I can't unsay what you heard. Because Kuro-sama, you heard me right- and I won't try to fight them back or hide my feelings for you anymore."

Your breath catches again, and you continue to stare at me, this time in confusion.

"I unapologize." I finish- steel in my eyes and your confusion slowly morphs into understanding.

"You bring that up now, mage? Piffle was forever ago." Your voice has a slight rasp to it.

I nod.

"You mean it?" Your tone is now off and I gulp.

"Yes. I unapologize." I say again.

A huge, almost uncharacteristic grin crosses your face and it catches me off guard.

You pull me in close- so that I'm straddling your hips, and you kiss me harshly on the lips- as if you had wanted to do this for years.

It was what I'd wanted for so long and I moan delighted into your mouth.

You then pull back, "I love you too, Fai." you murmur, saying my name for the first time.

You kiss me again, this time inserting your tongue into my mouth and both mine and yours tangle together in a hot, delicious dance.

"Say it again." You whisper, moving your mouth to my neck in order for me to speak- running your tongue over my pulse. My hands tangle in your soft spikes and my mind is working on hyper drive- trying to take in your words. That you love me too. That my greatest dreams were happening.

I finally manage to clear my head enough to whisper speak, to answer your question.

"I love you, Kuro-sama, and I unapologize."

**I hope that you guys enjoyed that! It's been awhile since I didn't write outright smut. Anyway, I should have time over Thanksgiving break to write more Falling Into Wonderland- so hold your horses guys. I have homework to catch up on and final exams Monday and Tuesday of next week.**

**Anyway, if you liked this you should check out BFTNCT, FIW, and my Ryu Prologue. Why? Because I'm really proud of them.**

**See you soon! XD**


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